Misadventures in Boonie Stomping 2

Our second foray into boonie stomping was where the shenanigans really began. First hike of two: the Piti guns. A set of three guns left by the Japanese with a good view from the top. A simple 0.1 mile hike with a 50 gain in elevation. What did we find?

Piti Guns
Rain. Tropical, driving, cat and dog rain. This is the beginning of hike. It doesn't look too bad. But after Tim uttered the famous words "It will let up in a minute," it continued to rain harder and harder.

Piti Guns
Tim at the 3rd gun. Note the great view behind him. Oh wait, you could only see about 20 ft through the rain.

Piti Guns
Rain? What rain? We just jumped into a lake for fun. So, instead of going home and drying off, we went onto a second hike: the Fonte Dam. It's an old brick dam built under the orders of President Hoover.

Fonte Dam start
The start to the hike. Seems simple enough. Hike down the power lines, turn left, reach the dam only 0.4 miles away.

Guam flowers Guam flowers
Some pretty flowers along the way.

Fonte Dam
The dam itself. Not quite as impressive as that other Hoover Dam, but cool none the less.

Fonte Dam descent
Of course, someone tied a rope dow the side of the dam, so we couldn't let that go unused.

Fonte Dam descent
Tim at the bottom successfully. No problems, everyone's happy. Right?

Fonte Dam bloody
Well, things are beginning to go downhill. (Not the hike, that was uphill at this point.) My leg was thoroughly bloodied by the saw grass on the hike. Still not too bad (or funny).

Fonte Dam leech
Of course, this is a portrait of one of the leech-like creatures that was in Tim's clothes after his foray into the water.

Oh, speaking of insects, on our way back to the car, we walked through some nice head-height grass. In this grass Tim somehow managed to mobilize a boonie bee (like a wasp but bigger and uglier) and cause it to shoot directly into my chin. The result:

Big lip
Brett with a gigantic lip. No special effects or pouting are involved in this picture.

Big lip profile
The profile shot. After the rather intense pain died down Tim and had quite the fun with it. I couldn't help but laugh any time I saw a mirror. I went into a gas station to get some ice and a big native guy helpfully informed me that urine was good for bee stings. Thanks! Also whenever I talked, I sounded like Bill Murray in Caddyshack. So for your viewing pleasure:


Me doing a Carl impression with a gigantic lip. (See the real speech here)

Coastal scenery
That afternoon we went scuba diving. Luckily my lip went down enough to grip a regulator in my mouth.

Coastal scenery
More coastal scenery. We did two dives. One was the Blue Hole, where we descended through an underwater cave that had an exit on the side of an underwater cliff. The second was the CV Junkyard, where a large number of construction vehicles and supplies were dumped underwater and now form the basis of a reef.

Coastal scenery
Of course, we still weren't free of rain storms.

Coastal scenery
I blame John McCain for everything that happened.